You will be momentarily excited about having a book published, and in that moment you will tell everyone you know. They will naturally ask "What is your book about?", thinking they might be talking to the next David Foster Wallace. When you tell them your book is called "100 Tea Cozies You Can Knit," their faces will fall. "Oh," they'll be thinking to themselves, "so he's not really a writer." Eventually, you will be so shell-shocked and defensive about your book's subject matter, you will snarl and say "What's it to ya?" when anyone asks.
--THE INTERN, on why you really don't want to get published.
I got to be so suave by knowing what the ladies like. And what the ladies like is... Sandman and Strangers in Paradise trades, amirite?
--Mike Sterling, on his worldliness and sophistication.