If my childhood plans had panned out...

Inspired by this Pleated Jeans cartoon, if my childhood plans had panned out...

My profession would be:



Space smuggler.

My wife would be:



Jaime Sommers, the Bionic Woman.

My car would be:



The Ark II.

My home would be:



The Swiss Family Robinson treehouse.

My best friend would be:



Chewbacca.

My backyard would have:



The Batcave beneath it.

All my dinners would include:



My mom's homemade pizza.

My kids would be named:




Athena and Apollo.

What about you?

BlogTV: Castle; Battlestar Galactica

Castle Promo



So awesome. And just in case you were worried, Castle's been renewed for next season.

Battlestar Rhapsody



This is pretty old, but it's worth watching all the way through if you haven't seen it yet. I LOLed several times.

Friday Night Art Show: Ba Duba Dot, Du Bot

Old Stormalong



By Florence and Margaret Hoopes. [Lady, That's My Skull]

Squid, Where Is Thy Sting?



By Al Avison. And if you want to see Green Hornet use the sting ray to escape the squid, and then use both of them to fight off a shark... well, all you gotta do is click the following link. [Also from Lady, That's My Skull]

The Mermaid



By Warwick Goble. [Never Sea Land]

The Island of Captain Sparrow



No, not that Captain Sparrow. At least I don't think so. Boy, that would be really cool though, wouldn't it? By Norman. [American Pulps and Magazines]

King of Chaos



Artist unknown. [FictionMags Index]

House of the Wolf Man



Poster from the upcoming movie. [Bloody Disgusting]

Dwellers in the Mirage



Artist unknown [Poulpe Pulps]

Slave Leia



By Katie Cook.

Daggit Dreams



Eric Chu's concept art from Bryan Singer's Battlestar Galactica re-reboot. While it's very cool to see Muffit there, I'm not too excited yet. The caption for this piece reads, "Boxey dreams of a Daggit on LV-426." Still, I'm hoping that Singer works back in - in a meaningful way - the one thing that was sadly missing from Ron Moore's version. Click the following link for more art, including the Cylons and various ships. [Cinemaspy]

Mmm Bot



By Jeremy Vanhoozer.

Quotes of the Week: A Work of Genius

Julia describes the perfect poached egg as an oval, where the white nicely encapsulates the yolk, and she seems to envision a sort of smooth presentation, without any ... well, without any of what is going on with this particular egg, as far as looking like a wadded-up Kleenex.
--Linda Holmes, sharing her own experience with Julia Child's Mastering the Art of French Cooking. With pictures.

You know, if they can publish Galactica 1980 comics, you'd think my Q.E.D. pitch would at least merit a response.
--Tom Spurgeon, surprising me with the revelation that I'm not the only person who remembers that show.

People invest a lot of time trying to make a layout for their ships that they think is a work of genius, then express dismay when their tactic of bunching all their ships in the upper-right hand corner leads to total annihilation.
--Topless Robot, accurately describing every experience I've ever had playing Battleship.

Quote of the Week: The Double-Whammy of Boomer Death

Boomer getting killed = love it. I have no sympathy for that Tyrol-playin' child-stealin' Cavil-humpin' ho bag. I'm an Athena boy all the way. Glad she was the one who got to do Boomer in. It would've been even cooler if Helo had run up to her and punched her in the head at the same time Athena shot her. The double-whammy of Boomer death.
--Grant Gould, with whom I agree on just about everything concerning the Battlestar Galactica finale.

Awesome List: Primeval, boardgames, giant monsters and robots, spacemen, BSG, and Star Wars

Primeval



Dinosaurs invade the modern world. Coming soon to BBCAmerica.

Dust



Axis and Allies, if there had been giant robots and other alien tech available during WWII.

Speaking of boardgames...

Topless Robot rates the five best and worst boardgames based on movies. They forgot Star Wars: Escape from the Death Star though. Definitely should've been in the Best list.

Gigantic



Rick Remender and Eric Nguyen are coming out with a comic about giant robots, monsters, and consumer culture.

More giant robots vs. giant monsters

Robert Hood's got the dope on G. It features one of the coolest giant robot designs I've ever seen. And a giant monster using a couple of train cars as nunchuks.

Additional Laws of Robotics

Something Awful has discovered 27 more, less-famous Laws that Asimov came up with. Like this one:

23. A robot must shut up around girls and let me, Isaac Asimov, do the talking; however, a robot may bail me out if things start to go haywire.

Pulp Sci Fi work safety posters

I wish my work was cool enough to hang these around.

Buck Rogers Doll



It's a great-looking doll. I just don't know if it's $175 worth of great-looking.

Caprica trailer

Eric Stoltz almost makes me want to watch the otherwise lame-looking soap opera Caprica. Think I'll just pop in Some Kind of Wonderful again instead.

And as long as we're talking about Battlestar Galactica spin-offs I'm not interested in

TokyoPop's got a BSG manga anthology coming out.

Okay, back to the Awesome...



Whatever eFx Collectibles is asking for this Ralph McQuarrie version Vader helmet, it'll be worth it.

You baked that? You're braver than I thought.



I'm hungry now.

How to make Battlestar Galactica 1000x better

I'm still catching up on Battlestar Galactica this season and I'm just now up to the part where it's starting to get good. It's been a pretty dull season so far.

But even at its best, BSG has never been as good as it would be if it looked like this.



How come no one asked for GQ's input when they were developing the show?

Click here for Humongous Version.

Awesome List: Psych and Burn Notice, Marvel movies and cartoons, giant monsters, and still more Indy

Josie gets Psyched



Rachel Leigh Cook is going to be on an episode of Psych; playing Shawn's high school crush. Also, Cybill Shepherd will be playing Shawn's mom in a couple of episodes.

Even more important to know: the next season kicks off July 18.

Six gets Burned



Man, I'm just full of the puns today, aren't I? Genuinely sorry.

Anyway, in other awesome USA Network news, Tricia Helfer's going to be in a few episodes of Burn Notice. Season Two begins on July 10.

Jin gets Strained



Okay, I guess I wasn't that sorry.

Finding out that Daniel Dae Kim from Lost is in A&E's Andromeda Strain mini-series on May 26 and 27 makes me sort of want to see it.

Marvel movies and TV

I haven't talked much about Iron Man, because I really don't have anything to add to the discussion. I feel just like everyone else who's seen it: it's the best superhero movie ever made and it makes me want to read about that Tony Stark in the comics. I'm thinking I'll probably start with Enter the Mandarin. I hear good things.

Also, that scene after the credits was awesome and it makes me even more excited to see The Incredible Hulk because I have a feeling we're going to see it repeated there. The weekend Iron Man was released, Marvel announced it's movie plans for the next couple of years: Iron Man 2 and Thor in 2010, then Captain America and The Avengers in 2011. An Ant-Man movie is also supposed to fit in there somewhere.

I've been wondering why Marvel would bother with an Ant-Man movie until I saw this schedule and realized that Iron Man, the Hulk, and Thor are the original Avengers, with Captain America joining soon afterwards. Except that Iron Man, the Hulk, and Thor weren't the entire original team. There was also Ant-Man. (And the Wasp, but she's Ant-Man's wife and could possibly appear in the Ant-Man movie, if they plan to use her at all.)

So, I'm speculating that we'll see a similar post-credits scene in all the upcoming Marvel movies, culminating in an amazing cross-over movie event, The Avengers.

In other Marvel screen news, Marvel recently announced a new cartoon for next year. Marvel Super Hero Squad is a "'super stylized' animated series geared toward 6- to 8-year-olds." It'll be joining Marvel's current cartoon properties: Spectacular Spider-Man (possibly the greatest super-hero cartoon of all time), Wolverine and the X-Men, and Iron Man: Armored Adventures.

Giant, floating, space squid



Undead Backbrain profiles my new favorite giant monster: Dogora.

The Outlander monster



Looks Awesome, doesn't it? It's from that Vikings vs. alien vs. giant monster movie Undead Backbrain has been telling us about.

Indiana Jones and the Tomb of the Gods



The ads for Dark Horse's Indiana Jones and the Tomb of the Gods comic have been frustrating in their lack of information about the story. Here's the solicitation for the first issue:

Dr. Henry Jones Jr. may be the world's preeminent archeologist, but that doesn't mean he's spent his life in the library! Ready and able to do whatever it takes to preserve the final remnants of history's most significant happenings, he'll go head-to-head against Hitler's elite who want nothing more than to exploit objects of ancient power in pursuit of world dominance!

Be there for the beginning of this roller coaster thrill ride of non-stop excitement as Indiana Jones dons his hat, packs his whip, and undertakes an endeavor more awesome than anything ever!

Indiana Jones sets out on an all-new adventure that will take him around the globe!

I'm not looking for spoilers here, but that's not at all helpful, right? It's just a summary of the basic Indiana Jones concept. Like we really need to know what that is. It doesn't tell you anything about when the adventure takes place or even what "the Tomb of the Gods" is supposed to be. The ads for issues 2 and 3 aren't any better.

Fortunately, Comic Book Resources has an interview with some extra information. It's set in between Temple of Doom and Raiders at a time when Indy is transitioning from being all about "fortune and glory" to becoming the "it belongs in a museum" guy. Personally, I'm not sure those two statements show the character growth that Tomb of the Gods writer Rob Williams sees in them, but that's a subject for a longer post. Williams says that the "fortune and glory" Indy would've shot the ark with a bazooka at the end of Raiders and Tomb of the Gods is meant to depict that change. (I agree that Indy has changed by the end of Raiders, but it's a change we see within Raiders itself, not off-camera sometime after Temple of Doom.)

They're still not telling what The Tomb of the Gods is, but I can let that go. Even if I don't agree with him, I appreciate the thought that Williams has put into his story, so I'll be checking it out when it's available in collected form.

Indiana Jones makes everything better, part whatever

This is another travel package, but unlike Expedia's that just lets you visit the locations from the various Indy films, Viajes Con Imaginación have a deal that's part Egyptian travel; part mystery party.

...they not only organize your entire itinerary, but they also plan strange things and make them happen to you. For example: robberies, kidnappings, ghosts coming to haunt you at night...

They also do a Jack the Ripper themed London tour. So very, very cool.

Michael Bay: Crystal Skull is "gonna suck."

You might be surprised to hear it after reading that headline, but I have new respect for Michael Bay.

Awesome Stuff: Galactica cast, buy Ming's cape, new pulp scifi, new Jack Ryan movies, Steam Wars, Chuck and Lost news, Caprica, and more

Battlestar Galactica at SCI FI's upfront



Tons of pictures and a brief report of the event at the Battlestar Blog.

Huge Sci Fi live auction on the Ebay

Includes Charles Middleton's Ming cape from Flash Gordon (1936), a hydraulic velociraptor from Jurassic Park, Michael Keaton's Batman costume, an original King Kong poster, and more. SCI FI Wire has the details.

Didn't like the ending to Cloverfield?

Pick another.

Wonder Woman statue



I'm not enough of a fan to fork out 300 bucks for it, but dang that's a nice statue. Real leather and fabric on the costume and everything. Not sure what the lasso's made of, but it looks real too.

Scifi is dead; long live the Kings

One of the reasons io9 cites critics as saying why the science fiction genre is dead is that "SF is now real life." To which I say, "Fine." I've always been more interested in the fantasy elements of it anyway. Hard scifi bores the crap out of me. Hard scifi is inexcusably deficient in Wookiees, ray guns, and space princesses.

Fortunately though, not all modern scifi authors feel like they have to realistically portray or predict the science. Maybe it's not real scifi, but I'll take S.M. Stirling's version any day. He describes his novel In the Courts of the Crimson Kings this way:

"In [the book's] timeline, we discover in the course of the 20th century that Mars (and Venus) are living worlds, with strangely humanoid inhabitants--[which is] confirmed by Soviet and American space probes in the early 1960s... The Mars of Crimson Kings is a dying but still habitable world, with the wreck of an ancient civilization that once ruled the entire planet under the Tollamune dynasty, when Earthlings were still cracking flints and fighting off cave bears."

New Jack Ryan movies?

Not interested. The franchise has already been killed by the Affleck reboot. Trying to start over yet again is like making a copy of a copy, even if Sam Raimi is directing. Unless of course they get someone really cool to play Ryan, in which case I don't care what the character's name is, I'll see it because it's a spy movie with a cool actor.

But honestly, if they want to just toss a Tom Clancy name on their non-Clancy movies to increase audience recognition, they should make them Mr. Clark movies and let Ryan appear as a recurring, supporting character.

Steam Wars and Undead Backbrain



Robert Hood's Undead Backbrain blog is fricking Awesome and you should be reading it. It would save me having to link to him every single day if you did, which is what it looks like I'll be doing if his content stays as consistent as it has so far. He's the one who turned me on to Automatons and that viking vs. aliens film.

Now though, it's all about Steam Wars, a steampunk giant-monster project by the guy who did The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra. Even if the film never gets made, it's worth the post just to see the concept art.

Chuck news (and a little bit of Lost)

The writers of Chuck are taking advantage of their strike hiatus to tweak the show a little. According to TV Guide's Michael Ausiello who attended the Chuck panel at Paley Fest, "'The idea is to own the fact that we've been off the air for several months, so there's a reset that's going to happen,' said (co-creator Josh) Schwartz of the second-season premiere, slated for September. 'We're going to bring in some fresh new characters, some new villains.'"

Lost producer Damon Lindelof moderated the panel and snuck in a bit of Lost news "by revealing the real reason the four-toed statue has yet to be seen again. After the monument first appeared 'we got a note back from the network that said, "This is too weird,"' he explained. 'I was like, "Do you watch the show? This is too weird?" Essentially, they said, "Could it be a six-toed statue?" I was like, "Someone explain to me why a six-toed statue is less weird than a four-toed statue?" And they're still noodling on that.'"

Caprica

I might change my mind once Battlestar comes back on and I start getting into it again, but right this second I need some convincing that the Caprica prequel series is going to be worth watching. It sort of sounds like Dynasty in space.

The Awesome List: Steampunk Daleks, new Robocop, Army of Frankenstein, and more

Steampunk Dalek



Via.

A "harder," "more aggressive" Pushing Daisies

I was pretty amazed at Pushing Daisies' ability to keep me coming back for new episodes last fall. Part of it -- a large part of it -- was Kristen Chenoweth. But part of it's just that the writers were surprisingly able to keep it as interesting and quirky as the pilot promised.

I like its charmingly macabre tone and from what I can tell, that's what most people seem to respond to about it, so it's a little alarming to hear its creator talk about how it's going to have a "harder and a little more aggressive" style next season. I don't really know what that means and I'll certainly keep watching until I don't like it anymore, but "harder" and "more aggressive" aren't words I would've associated -- or wanted to associate -- with the show.

Robocop Returns

MGM's announced its plans for some new movies including revisiting the Robocop franchise. I think that's swell -- a lot more swell than their plans to for sequels to The Pink Panther and The Thomas Crown Affair and remakes of Death Wish and Fame -- as long as they keep Paul Verhoeven away from it. Robocop was a great concept, but I haven't seen a Verhoeven movie that I've liked.

Space Vulture



Most of the space opera I hear about these days is all trying to make some kind of point about sociology or politics or religion. They may be very fun stories, but I'll never know because the story summaries put me to sleep. But this... this I can get into. (Thanks to Ron Fortier for pointing it out.)

The Book of Lies

I haven't enjoyed all of Brad Meltzer's comics work, but I like him a lot as a person and I think he's got some great ideas about storytelling and the publishing industry in general. Like when he recently conducted an email poll amongst his readers to see if -- without knowing anything about the story -- they liked the title Book of Truth or Book of Lies better. His rationale: "I don't care where you work or what your job is, or how much money you make, or what style of shirt/jeans/anything you're wearing. That's just not important, and I'm tired of all the things in this world that make us believe that it is. We are all pathetically ordinary and spectacularly special. All of us. And I ask you because you're far more real than some marketing consultant that studies this crap so much they rob it of all its fun."

I voted for The Book of Lies because it sounds way more interesting than The Book of Truth. I love Truth and I keep trying to live a more and more honest life, but let's face it, especially in the world of fiction, lies are so much more fun. And apparently, I'm not alone in thinking that.

Hulk #1 Project

The Hero Initiative, a charity dedicated to helping veteran comic book creators in need, is putting out a collection of 100 original Hulk covers similar to last year's Ultimate Spider-Man #100 Project. The link describes it way better than I can, but needless to say, I'll be getting a copy of this.

Army of Frankenstein



Coming soon to Rick Remender's rotating-story horror series Crawl Space.

Spock Smacks

"The greatest image mankind has ever seen."

Lost and Battlestar Galactica: BFFs

The funniest thing I read all day.

The Awesome List: Indy and Buck Rogers comics, Galactica on Letterman, Deathly Hallows movies, X-Files 2, Eurospies, giant lobsters, and more

Indiana Jones Adventures



This is kind of old news, but Dark Horse Comics is gearing up in May for Kingdom of the Crystal Skull with lots of Indiana Jones comics, some of them reprints; some of them new. One of the new ones is the first volume of Indiana Jones Adventures, a cartoony kid-friendly digest-sized comic. And if there's anything that Marvel Adventures has taught me, it's that I'm enjoying the kid-friendly comics a lot more than the adult ones lately. I expect this to be twice the fun and excitement that any of the other Indy comics are.

Also coming from Dark Horse in May is a new anthology of prose Hellboy stories: Oddest Jobs.

New Buck Rogers comics

Crap. Dynamite Entertainment has been getting me closer and closer to buying some of their stuff as monthly singles instead of waiting for the trade paperback collections. I think they've finally figured out how to push me over the edge.

Battlestar Galactica cast on Letterman

Phone the neighbors and wake the kids. Or at least set the TiVo. Edward James Olmos, Mary McDonnell, Katee Sackhoff, Jamie Bamber, James Callis, Tricia Helfer, Grace Park, Michael Hogan, Aaron Douglas and Lucy Lawless will all be on Letterman to do the Top 10 List this Wednesday night, March 19.

Harry Potter 7 (and 8)



In case you've been in outer space since last Thursday and haven't heard, Warner Brothers is splitting Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows into two movies.

X-Files 2 has wrapped

I cannot freaking wait.

Agent 077

That's not a typo. It's an actual spy series from the '60s that Christopher Mills has the info (and the trailers) on. Looks schnazzy.

Salt Water Taffy



Oni's got a new comic coming about an "unusual hamlet called Chowder Bay–a small town full of big mysteries, giant adventures, and gargantuan lobsters." There's even an old sea dog fighting a giant lobster right on the cover. I'll be in line right behind Heidi MacDonald for my copy.

DC's Manhunter returns

I was pretty late coming to the Manhunter party. It took a big Wonder Woman story to get me to even take a look and that was after the series already had gone into hiatus. But I read it, loved it, and now I'm as excited as anyone else that it's finally coming back. Anyone interested in strong, three-dimensional, female characters should really give this series a look.

Not Awesome: Cliff Chiang leaving Black Canary

In all fairness, I've enjoyed Judd Winick's writing on Green Arrow and Black Canary about 3000 times more than I expected to. So I'll still be reading the series, even though it makes me very sad that Cliff Chiang will no longer be illustrating it. He'll still be doing covers, which is nice, but his next series will be something for Vertigo.

Mike Norton is replacing Chiang and from what I've seen on his blog, he should do just fine. Still, sad to see Chiang go.

Video du Jour: Cowboy George

Remember that episode of The A-Team with Boy George? Seeing that Face Man wasn't into Culture Club was the final proof I needed that he was no replacement for Starbuck. Now, Mr. T and Mad Dog... they had taste.

The Awesome List: Indiana Jones, Giant Monsters, Albert Einstein’s secret doomsday device, and the Return of TV

Indy's hat and jacket

IndianaJones.com has a new featurette about Indy's iconic look and trying to recreate it for the new movie.

Indy's trailer

Apparently, the teaser trailer for Indy and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull will be attached to The Spiderwick Chronicles when it hits theaters on Thursday. I also saw something on IndianaJones.com earlier today about the trailer's TV and 'net debuts, but I can't find it now. Either I've gone stupid (entirely possible) or the info was released prematurely or is being changed. I'll let you know which once I know.

Giant Robots are stupid.

According to TechRepublic.

Oh, wait. No, they're not.

Says Jeremiah Tolbert.

Three Days to Never

According to Bookgasm, Tim Powers' Three Days to Never contains all of my favorite things: "hidden histories ... spirits, spies, talking disembodied heads, dybbuks, time travel, Charlie Chaplin’s quest for magical power, Albert Einstein’s secret doomsday device, and about a million other awesome things." So totally sold.

Welcome back, TV.

With the WGA strike all but officially over, TV Guide has a new strike chart up predicting when we'll start seeing new episodes of our favorite shows. Here are the ones that interest me:

Battlestar Galactica: Returns April 4 with first half of 20-episode final season. Production on second half could start as early as March. Airdate for those TBD.

The Big Bang Theory: Expected to shoot 5 to 7 new episodes to air in April/May.

Burn Notice: Production on Season 2 expected to get underway in late April. New episodes could start airing as early as July.

Chuck: No new episodes until fall.

Grey's Anatomy: Expected to shoot 4 to 7 new episodes to air in April/May

House: Expected to shoot 4 to 6 new episodes to air in April/May.

Jericho: Seven episodes remain. No additional episodes expected for this season.

Lost: Six pre-strike episodes remain. Six additional episodes could air this season.

Men in Trees: Eleven pre-strike episodes remain. No additional episodes expected this season.

The Office: Expected to shoot 5 to 10 new episodes to air in April/May.

Private Practice: Slim chance it could return with 4 or 5 new episodes this season. Either way, it'll be back in the fall.

Pushing Daisies: No new episodes until fall.

Scrubs: Four pre-strike episodes remain. Four additional episodes will likely be shot; unclear whether they'll air on NBC or go straight to DVD.

Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles: Five pre-strike episodes remain. Future beyond that TBD.

Links du Jour: Galactica spoilers, new Stargate series, and the Harry Potter cast

Adventure

• In the back of DC's weekly 52 series, they've been running these two-page origin stories of the various DC superheroes. At the end of each one, they give a short list of "Essential Storylines" of the character. Every Day is Like Wednesday has been reviewing not just the storylines, but the lists themselves, and adding other essential material to it. It's cool reading if you've ever wanted to know more about a particular DC character, like I have about Zatanna (it's the fishnets).
• I totally missed that Shang Chi: Master of Kung Fu appeared in last month's issue of Wisdom. Gonna have to go back and get that one.
• Today's Quentin Tarantino's 44th birthday.

Fantasy

• Though Emma Watson made fans sweat a little, they can rest easy now. Watson and the other two main Harry Potter actors have all signed on to complete the movie series.

Science Fiction

• Geek Monthly has a nice recap of a couple of interviews that Battlestar Galactica co-creator Ron Moore has given lately. As Geek says, "It is clear that he is thinking of an endgame for the franchise, but won’t say for sure if season 4 will be the final voyage." There are a couple of spoilers about Season 4 there, some clarification about the Season 3 finale, and story details about the direct-to-DVD movie coming out this fall. Good stuff for BSG fans.
• Looks like there's a new Stargate series in the works: Stargate Universe.
• I'm too old to have grown up with the Transformers, so I don't have an ingrained fondness for them, but I now have a reason to be excited about the new movie: Hugo Weaving is voicing Megatron.

Other Comics News

• Man, I wish I lived in New York so I could go to Autism Awareness Day at Shea Stadium and hang out with Kyle Baker and a mess of other comics professionals and journalists. Sounds like it's going to be a blast and for a fantastic cause. If you live in the area, check the link for updates about ticket prices, because they're cheaper if you get them in advance.

Galactica needs to get off the treadmill

I spent the first half of this season of Battlestar Galactica trying to adjust to the new feel of the show. Everything was so dark and painful to watch, but it was gripping. I always wanted to know where they were going next. Now that things are pretty much back to normal on the show, I'm getting restless. Yeah, there are moments that I love in each episode, but the feeling I'm getting is that the show is kind of running in place. And I'm not the only one.

The Geek Monthly blog offers some complaints about the season so far: "Ticking time bomb my butt! Athena got her baby back (baby back, baby back) without so much as a raised fisticuff. It’s like her rescue mission was on her 'to do' list between 'buy milk' and 'tape Lost.'"

And: "As Roslin keeps reminding us over the past few episodes, Baltar will be tried for his crimes. Eventually. After we cover all of the pressing story business of a racist doctor, a dead ex-wife, and how much Galen and Cally’s lives suck. Seriously though, after that it’s next on the agenda."

Agree? Disagree?