Saturday, March 07, 2009

Quotes of the Week: Hannah Montana edition

NPR was on fire this week. Three quotes from them (two being from Linda Holmes). Also: two Miley Cyrus mentions. Weird.

If this plays out as anticipated, all that's going to happen is that he's going to show up in public with the zoo animals and the oxygen tanks and the...whatever, Jedi costume, and there will be pictures of him in magazines where he's in a nun's habit, walking an ocelot and carrying a watering can, and then his nose will fall off during a charity benefit, and he'll make some weird new best friend like Joe The Plumber or Miley Cyrus, and we'll all be back on the Michael Jackson Express Train To Weirdsville, and I cannot take it.
--NPR's Linda Holmes, on Michael Jackson's expected attempt at a comeback.

For me, the cherry on this delightful cake of perversion is the expression on the alien's face. He's looking right at you, without an iota of shame [at] any of the decadence happening around him. You can judge him if you want. But he'll keep on sodomizing Kirk while Spock and McCoy tango behind him... and you can never make him feel bad about it.
--Topless Robot, describing a truly horrifying "collectible."

Can we all agree that "mythos" is a not an everyday word, and should not be treated as such? And further, that dropping "mythos" into a conversation when one is sporting a t-shirt upon which Wolverine is engaged in an act of disembowelment tends to leach the word of its power?
--NPR's Glen Weldon, on the inclination for comics fans to take their funnybooks too seriously.

That's definitely not a straight flush.
--Kevin Melrose, describing a set of yaoi playing cards.

Cyrus said she was so hurt by Yorke’s dismissal, she didn’t even watch their performance of “15 Step” with the USC Marching Band. “I’m gonna ruin them, I’m gonna tell everyone,” Cyrus threatened. She’ll definitely be downloading their next album for free instead of paying-what-she-wants. Plus, Radiohead’s Radio Disney days are so over, and you can expect to see a big dip in sales of In Rainbows in the “Female Aged 5-11" demographic.
--Rolling Stone, describing the inevitable consequences of Radiohead's dissing Hannah Montana.

Will there be kissing? When? Where? What music will be playing? What will everyone be wearing? Will this episode contain kissing? How about next week's? How about in the season finale? Do you think the "dramatic development" in TV Guide is about kissing? Did you see that screenshot that one guy posted from that one episode where there seems to be smudged lipstick on that one actress? I wonder if it's because she was just busy kissing. KISSING KISSING KISSING, and have I mentioned...kissing?
--Linda Holmes again, perfectly communicating how annoying 'shippers are.

You should click on that last Linda Holmes link, in which she also sums up everything that's usually wrong with "romantic" storylines on TV and observes how The Office has managed to avoid that trap.

2 comments:

West said...

Nice one. I had never heard of 'shippers, but now that I have, I, both, feel a little better and a little worse.

Michael May said...

I know how you feel. Knowledge is power, but ignorance is bliss. :)

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